Unresolved questions

I think my biggest fear was because… he died by suicide and so you as a mom, you just have all the guilt - like how didn’t you see this? How didn’t you know? Why couldn’t you protect him? - Family Member

In grieving a death by suicide, there are a lot of “what if” questions. Two of the most common are:

• “Why did this person take their life?”
• “What could I have done to prevent it?”

As you struggle to find answers, you may be putting together bits of information about the person who died or about their death. You may be searching for clues to help you piece together a story that helps you to make sense of your loss or understand how this death could have happened.

While it’s natural to want to understand what led to their death, these questions may be impossible to answer.

If a note was left, this final message can further complicate grief as we may try to read between the lines to find a deeper meaning that may not exist.

Suicide has been described as the least understood human behavior. In rare cases where someone survived what should have been a fatal suicide attempt, they often speak about how they did not recognize the person they were at the time. It suggests a profoundly altered psychological state, as if they were another person entirely when they made the attempt.

I felt like I was in an endless canyon of questions and time. - Family Member

Most people eventually to come to a place where they more or less accept the unknowns surrounding the death.